Ever since I was young
You know, I hated dissention
Among my peer group
It caused a whole lot of tension
When the other kids were slouching
I would stand at attention
And I've always looked so good in white
Now I'm a bad mamma-jamma
And I rock a mean helmet
If I see a rebellion
Then you know I'm gonna quell it
I'm a certified, full-blown
Armor-wearing zealot
And it feels so good to know I'm always right
You can see exotic worlds across the galaxy
In the empire
Buford and baljeet: In the empire
You can be all that they want you to be
You get a 401(k) and your meals are free
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire
I don't know but I've been told
The rebels need to be controlled
We'll round them up and put 'em all in stocks
But first we've gotta get darth vader socks!
It's so not fair!
I mean, why am I still on sock detail
When gladys from accounting got promoted to commander
And she doesn't even know how to hold a blaster?
No, I mean, really, she failed that part of the exam four times
She held it backwards and upside down
But no, she's a second cousin of some midlevel darth
And so she gets a promotion? What about me?
If they would just open their eyes
They'd see that I've got everything it takes
I could be the stormiest stormtrooper evaah!
Ya feelin' better?
Yeah, thanks
You can see exotic worlds across the galaxy
In the empire
Buford and baljeet: In the empire
You can be all that they want you to be
You can march to the beat of conformity
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire
In the empire!