At the Presbyterian Picnic
The donation plate was full of cashews
And the minister's wife got the scare of her life
When the hamburger flipper said he used to be a Jew
And a man from the mission was passing a petition
Asking for permission to review the schools
Jane and Mohammed where trying not to vomit
After finishing a bottle of perfume and booze
And across the bridge was a satellite dish
Broadcasting all the sermons live
Can you imagine what this gathering would be like
Without a Lord to lead you
Without His big farm to feed you
No message no God no guide
The cross was hung from a popular
The one right beside the old lover's tree
And the oldest inscription was from '69 saying
The way things are going they're gonna crucify me
And a baby in a turban being suckled with bourbon
Got his hands on a mounty's new gun
But it didn't really matter the flock had all scattered
A Muslim made a bid for the playground at one
And across the bridge were two kids in a ditch
Making love for the first time it was a bit of a joke
The whole thing had been cleared with their folks
They had a Lord to lead them
This big farm there to feed them
That message that God that guide
And they all sang
Oh no oh no no no
I don't wanna die
At the Presbyterian picnic
The portrait was shot on the merry go round
But the Fisherman, the Seek and the born again freak
Had a bit of trouble keeping their lips on the ground
Desmond and Deloris were leading in the chorus
Of When the Saints Go Marching In
No the garbage was rejected it never got collected
Cause there's no place up in heaven you can trade your bottles in
And across the bridge was a boy with one wish
Trying hard not to waste it
He looked up to that light and he closed his eyes tight
I just want that Lord to lead me
His great big farm there to feed me
That message that God that guide
I just want that Lord to lead me
His great big farm there to feed me
That message that God that guide