Epic Rap Battles of History!
Donatello, Michelangelo, Leonardo, Rafael versus Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello, and Rafael! Begin!
(Artist Leonardo)
Cowabunga, dude! So lets get it on!
Reptiles against the fathers of the Renaissance!
We got the classical technique to kick these three-toed freaks back under the street! (Ooh!)
I take a turtle and I turn him into mincemeat!
You don't really want to step to da Vinci!
I love the ladies; I like to keep it mellow!
So let me pass the mic to my man, Donatello!
(Artist Donatello)
Hard shell, but you're gross in the middle;
Wouldn't want to touch you with a six-foot chisel!
Born in goop, raised in poop; I slice through a group of ninjas like fruit, oops!
(Artist Rafael)
Yo! Rafael, and I came to flow!
Deemed dope by the pope, and I boned til I croaked!
I'm an emcee Shredder but I get the feeling,
I should pass it up to my man on the ceiling!
(Artist Michelangelo)
Oh! Michelangelo and I'm giant!
I made David but I'll slay you like Goliath!
I'm a rap god and you can't quite touch me!
This battle's going last judgement, trust me!
(Artists Leonardo and Donatello)
We drop science!
(Artists Michelangelo and Rafael)
We got the mathematics!
(All Artists)
The architects of rebirth are rap addicts!
You beat the foot, but it won't go well
(Artist Donatello)
when you catch an Italian
(Artists Leonardo, Michelangelo and Rafael)
boot to the half-shell!
(Turtle Leonardo)
The wisdom of our master (Splinter)
(Turtle Donatello)
taught us not to rush to violence.
(Turtle Raphael)
But our master (master splinter)
(Turtle Michelangelo)
ain't here dude!
(Turtle Leonardo)
I don't think you wanna with my katana blades!
Get back in your floppy helicopter, fly away!
(Turtle Michelangelo)
I can bebop and steady rock a mic, sucka!
I'm a pristine Sistine nun chucka!
(Turtle Raphael)
Uh! Oh hi, I'm a cool but rude guy!
Put you back in school with the tip of my two sai!
(Turtle Donatllo)
Uh... Dona, tell me who you are again, dude,
Cause I don't Gattamelata clue what you do!
(Artist Donatello)
That's because you mutants are too immature!
(Artist Leonardo)
You wouldn't know genius if it pissed in your sewer!
(Artist Rafael)
We got the talent
(All Artists)
and the minds
(Artist Rafael)
and the rhymes so sweet!
(Artist Michelangelo)
We're like your NES game
(All Artists)
cause we can't be beat!
(Turtle Leonardo)
Yo go ahead and hate; we'll just skate on by!
(Turtle Michelangelo)
You guys draw more dicks than New York pride!
(All Turtles)
We're the TMNT! Drop-kicking Italy!
(Turtle Michelangelo)
Chowing on your tower made of pizza!