I´ll tell you a story that happened to me
One day as I went down to Youghal by the sea,
The sun it was bright and the day it was warm
Says I „a quiet pint wouldn´t do me no harm.
I went in and I called for a bottle of Stout
Says the barman „I´m sorry all the beer is sold out,
Try whisky or Paddy ten years in the wood"
Says I „I´ll try the cider, I hear that it´s good".
REF: Oh never oh never oh never again
If I live to a hundred or a hundred and ten!
I fell to the floor and I couldn´t get up
After drinking a quart of the Johnny Jump Up.
After leaving the third I went to the yard
Where I bumped into Brophy the big civic guard.
„Come here to me boy, don´t you know I´m the law?"
I upped with my fist and I shattered his jaw.
He fell to the ground with his knees doubled up
But it wasn´t I hit him, it was Johnny Jump Up.
The next thing I met down in Youghal by the sea
Was a cripple on cruches and he says to me:
„I´m afraid of my life, I´ll be hit by a horse,
Won´t you help me across to the Railway Man´s bar?"
After drinking a quart of the cider so sweet
He threw down his crutches and he danced in the street.
REF: Oh never oh never oh never again.....
I went to the Lee Road friends for to see,
They call it the madhouse in Cork by the Lee.
But when I got up there the truth I do tell,
They had the poor beggar locked up in a cell.
Said the guard testing him „say these words if you can -
Around the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran".
Tell them I´m not crazy, tell them I´m not mad,
It was only a drop of the cider I had.
REF: Oh never oh never oh never again.....
A man died in the Union by the name of Mac Nabb.
They washed him and laid him outside on a slab
And after O'Connor his measurements did take,
His wife took him home for a bloody fine wake.
About twelve o´clock and the beer it was high,
When the corpse he sat up and he says with a sigh:
„I can´t get to heaven, they won´t let me up
'Till I bring them a quart of the Johnny Jump Up