Its Christmastime
And Santas here
Making the children smile
But hes just a pedophile
So you better watch your child
Christmas trees in every house
Covered in shiny lights
But they just turn brown and die
Or set your whole house on fire
These are the reasons
I hate the season
But Im a give it a try
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
Maybe Ill have a happy holiday
Replace my heartache and my pain
With mistletoe and candy canes
This Christmas could go my way
Having fun with all your friends
Sipping on that eggnog
But it just looks like j**z
All over your upper lips
House made out of gingerbread
Cookies like Christmas trees
Giving you heart disease
And type two diabetes
These are the reasons
I hate the season
But Im a give it a try
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
Maybe Ill have a happy holiday
Replace my heartache and my pain
With mistletoe and candy canes
This Christmas could go my way
Ive never seen reindeer fly
Ive never heard the sleigh bells ring
Never seen a snowman come to life
Ive never heard the angels sing
But I hope, and I pray
That maybe this Christmas day
Thatll change
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
Maybe Ill have a happy holiday
Replace my heartache and my pain
With mistletoe and candy canes
This Christmas could go my way
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
Maybe Ill have a happy holiday
Replace my heartache and my pain
Lets just dance the night away
This Christmas is going my way