Nausea hangs thick in this recycled air as they parade down the aisle
Foisting their trail mix on innocent people and flashing evil smiles
I'm afraid to touch my seat belt 'cause i think it carries disease
And the in-flight movie is about a plane crash so i think i'll try to sleep
Have you ever tried to sleep with no leg room? it's the worst
So i try to talk to the guy to my left, but all he does is burp
I wanna cheer myself up, but they're flashing the "no happiness" sign
Let me out, i'd rather wheel my suitcase by myself 3,000 miles
But i'd sit on this horrible plane if i had to
Every day if it meant i got to see you
And i would eat only pretzels
And i wouldn't get up to pee
I'll buy every ticket i find in existence for flight 413
The stewardess hates me, i don't know why
So i try to make nice
I think that maybe i've gotten through but then she takes my electronic device
I half-expect to see a monster out the window on the wing of the plane
'cause my motion sickness medication said i might hallucinate
But i'd sit on this horrible plane if i had to
Every day if it meant i got to see you
And i would eat only pretzels
And i wouldn't get up to pee
I'll buy every ticket i find in existence for flight 413
I wanna stretch my legs but oh no! here comes the drink cart!
Like the rolling rock in "raiders of the lost ark"
The two-year-old behind me begins to cry
This fucking kid is reading my mind
But i'd sit on this horrible plane if i had to
Every day if it meant i got to see you
And i would eat only pretzels
And i wouldn't get up to pee
I'll buy every ticket i find in existence for flight 413
It'll be worth it for a minute on earth with you after flight 413