I don't like humus, I hate long lines
Nosy neighbors and the nation blind
Chirpy news anchors alter my mood
I'm offended by buss words like awesome men do
I look like a train wreck, I feel like a blob
Till you get to know me, you may think I'm a snob
But I'm closer to heaven than I've ever been
I don't eat sushi, I don't smoke grass
I don't wear pajamas, I don't drive fast
I hate that all gossip and tassel shoes
Slick politicians, they give me the blues
I don't ride in Limos, I don't play golf
I don't own a riffle that will blow your head off
But I'm closer to heaven than I've ever been
I'm riding that way from cradle to grave
I'm learning to feel my hands on the wheel
I love my friends, I love my wife
Four little babies are the light of my life
I love Sissy Spacek, I love God Clark
All the biscuits and gravy I can eat with a fork
I don't wanna be famous, who gives a damn?
I just wanna be happy where ever I am
And I'm closer to heaven than I've ever been
I'm closer to heaven than I've ever been