Ev'ry time a cop falls down my spirits soar
I'm in heaven when a flat foot hits the floor
Billy clubs and nightsticks make me feel
Happy as a new born pup
' Cause ev'ry time a cop falls down
My heart leaps up
Hit 'em on the head
Ha ha ha
Kick 'em in the shins
Ha ha ha
The heroine's behind
Is oh so ripe for bruising
Lash 'em in the loin
Ha ha ha
Grind 'em in the groin
Ha ha ha
Audiences find
That pain is so amusing
Everybody loves a little rabbit punching
Everybody loves the sound of knuckles crunching
So flatten someone's nose
Ha ha ha
Stub somebody's toes
Make a little thud
Draw a little blood
Hit 'em on the head
Mash 'em in the mouth
Ha ha ha
Jab 'em in the jaw
Ha ha ha
Give a violent shove
And make it realistic
Club 'em on the hip
Ho ho ho
Make a swollen lip
Ho ho ho
Audiences love to be a bit sadistic
People just adore
A fight that's death defying
Love it even more
When there are bullets flying
So thrash 'em in the thigh
Ha ha ha
Blacken someone's eye
Ha ha ha
Get 'em in the gut
Bruise 'em on the butt
Hit 'em on the head
Cut-out of station house with Kops pouring out of it starts on through following
Cause a little wreck
Ha ha ha
Break somebody's neck
Ha ha ha
Shoot a little gun
Yes folks, it's scintillating
Watch the fella feel
And slip on that banana peel
Ha ha ha
The public finds it fun
When it's excruciating
Everybody loves to see policemen futile
In breaking up a brawl
That's been divinely brutal
So bite 'em in the calf
Ha ha ha
Listen to 'em laugh
Ha ha ha
Make a little slash
Make a wider gash
three Hit 'em on the head
People just adore a fight that's death-defying
Love it even more when there are bullets flying
So thrash 'em in the thigh
Ha ha ha
Blacken someone's eye
Ha ha ha
Get 'em in the gut
Bruise 'em on the butt
Make a little slash
Make a wider gash
Bite 'em on the calf
Listen to 'em laugh
Hit 'em on the head!