Every year I hear, "Happy holiday"
What's my religion? I do what the dollar say
That's why I celebrate Christmas
'Cause this overweighted redneck devil is big business
So all season I'm up preyin'
On black communities, is what I'm sayin'
And y'all keepin' me fat
All over America it's on like that
Kids lookin' for Saint Nick
Just leave me some cookies and get off my damn dick
You want a present? Nigga, please
Your house is a wreck, and you're decoratin' trees
Now how dumb can y'all be?
No food in the kitchen, and you go and buy a tree?
And then say it's for the children, but you're grown
They can't miss what they ain't never known
But since everybody else is out celebratin'
You allow your child to worship a Satan
Better known as Santa
Claws in your pocket from L.A. to Atlanta
And yeah pops, you're silly too
You shoulda told your children Santa Clause is really you
And spared 'em the sadness
Before they got all caught up in holiday madness
Holiday madness
A whole day dedicated to the devil
Is Palm Sunday, and after church I'm goin' huntin'
For colored eggs, 'cause Santa was frontin'
He musta thought it was Passover
'Cause he never brought his ass over my house
But today I get new clothes anyway
Plus a little money, thank you Easter Bunny
For the basket of jelly beans
Even though I don't know what the hell he means
I never read about him in the Bible
The horny little pagan idol
No wonder my mind is so twisted
But thank God my church wasn't broke-wristed
Even though I never went
I know I still can repent
'Cause ain't nobody perfect, but niggas so dense
We seem to only come together over nonsense
Holiday madness
A whole day dedicated to the devil
October 31st is my favorite
Little boys still at my do', 'cause I ain't gave 'em shit
But what you showed me in for?
Little brats yellin', "Trick or treat", all through my screen door
When y'all should be at home sleep
Instead of at my front porch 15 deep
The jack lantern came in handy
Yo, I can turn my porch light out like I ain't got no candy
But ain't that somethin'?
You buy a Halloween costume and a pumpkin'?
Almost gave your children a heart attack
It's a tradition, but who the hell started that?
A whole day dedicated to the devil
That's just one out of several
Most people don't think
But America need to see a shrink for her holiday madness
Holiday madness
A whole day dedicated to the devil
Damn, I can't wait until it get dark
So I can light these fireworks up at the park
And celebrate my independence
It's the 4th of July, but I ain't got 10 cents
I bought the jumbo assortment
Then came out the pocket for a goddamn skyrocket
And the shit was a dud
It was lit, but it never even left the mud
But at least I got freedom where I'm at
Plus Red Devil and Wild Cat
And they open 24 hours
And right about now they got a sale on bloomin' flowers
So I'm ready to celebrate
July 4th 1930, the true date
'Cause in 1776
Black people were still in the mix
Until the comin' of W.B. Farrhad
The God in person, yeah cursin' America
Word is bond
And left us Elijah and Farrakhan