I've got a paycheck in my front pocket,
A speeding ticket in my back pocket,
If I even things out, I might have enough to get drunk.
I've got a phone number, stuffed in my wallet,
I know I shouldn't do it but I think I'm gonna call it,
And if I get nuthin', that's fine, cause nuthin's what I got.
Brains, brains, you can't kill a zombie with a wooden stake.
Brains, brains, any one could make the same mistake,
So go easy on the girl.
I just wanted what every pirate wants,
I got some booty now I'll never get enough,
I just wanted, I just wanted . . . .
To sail, to pillage,
So pass the rum and draw your swords,
Let's burn down, the village,
Then we'll grab their boards and surf their girls away . . .
I've got a picture of a mermaid, hidden in a box,
A dollar fifty six and a dirty pair of socks,
An 'X' on the map, if I don't come back,
Here's where you'll find me.