Performed by Adam Sandler, Allen Covert, Jon Rosenburg, and Bob Glaub
Well I had myself a girlfriend
for all most two whole years.
We had ourselves no secrets,
we had no fears.
There was nothing we wouldn't do
when we were in the sack.
She'd even pop the zit on my back.
Well, one night I was out a-cheatin'
after I drank a few she caught me red-handed
and said, "we're through," boo hoo.
Now she got a new boyfriend
it nearly gave me a heart attack.
'Cause who's gonna pop this zit on my back?
Well I got a pimple and I don't know why
it keeps growing in the same place.
I can't reach it with my left or right hand.
I wish it was on my face.
It's four days old and it hurts so bad
but it's ready for a squeeze.
Won't somebody pop it for me please?
I'll give you ten dollars.
If you're a girl in this lonely world
and your looking for a guy,
I'll never cheat again I promise,
that's no lie.
There's only one thing I'll ask of you,
could we name our first child Zach?
Oh, one more thing please pop this zit on my back.
I'm dying here!
Well, I'm sittin' alone by the phone
and no one seemes to call.
I try to scrape my zit off on the kitchen wall.
Well, that don't work so I look around
and find a big, shiny thumb-tack.
Put it on the floor,
lay down,
pop the zit on my back.
yeah.