Red lipstick on my blue collar
And a number in Maybelline black eye liner
Written on a napkin in my back pocket
She found it right there, right before she washed it
Well I started back steppin', stumblin' and stutterin'
Tellin' her where I'd been and how she was just a friend
She said you know I know that ain't the truth
But if that's the story you're sticking to
Chorus
You can stick it where the sun don't shine
Gonna take her advice (sit back down)
And hitch me a ride (and stay here all night)
Went right back to that waterin' hole
Where the cold beer flows
And the Cuervo's gold
Suck a little salt and lime
Under that neon light
Gonna take my sorry behind
And stick it where the sun don't shine
And have me a good time
I got a call from Woodro, hey Bro
Your wardrobe is throw'd all over the lawn
There's a lot of black smoke coming from your bass boat
And your old lady's cussin' and a carryin' on
So I told Woodro put her on the cell phone
He said I can't Bro she's got me in a chokehold
Doing that Tae Bo, I think she broke my elbow
Hello, Woodrow, hello, hey, is that you baby?
Do what? She said
Repeat chorus
Tag
Hey, bartender
Pour me another one and make it strong
I bet old Woodro should be by here any minute
He's gonna need one too
Oh, hell, just bring me a bottle
It looks like I'm gonna be here a while