My name is Horace, Monster Squad enthusiast, doubled
Barreled fat kid beauty tips, a little devious, walk
On my own, head buried in the comics, a Sneaker's
Bar is a poem, man I wish alone, stupid bullies killed
The magazine, yo Rudy help me out, man you're smoother
Than Vaseline, if you're asking me, you should of
Made you're peace, cause right now you're looking
Foolish with chocolate stains on you're teeth, the
Wolf Man's just a creep, he tried to front and act hard,
So I kicked him in the crotch, Wolf Man's got nards!
So now I'm on the run, cause the walls are crushing
In, I got a date with The Creature, I'll show him
How the barrel grins, the Ghost Busters ain't shit,
Grown men chasing ghosts, I'm dealing with real life
Monsters man, these guys are just a joke, I think
There all blowing smoke, send my love to head hunters,
Me and my squad got it locked, hands in for blood brothers...
Cause we're the type of squad that's built to last,
If you show you're teeth, we'll erase you're past,
You can scare us all you want, but the squad ain't
Bailing, what is everybody yelling? monster, monster!
One hundred years ago, before this song begins, Vanhelsing
And his cronies and blew it again, I'm Dracula, I'll
Bite you on the neck and drain ya, this is for ever shot
That crossbow at my lady in Transylvania, I'm on the 125
Bitch slapping pilots, pull the cargo hatch, and I'll turn
Into a bat, on the front of my Hearse is a skull hood ornament,
Suck the blood out you're body, leave you with the color
Porcelain, all the zombie girls jock, cause my collar's poped,
Wolf Man's the homie, his nards and his word is all he has,
You can try and kill me, all I do is laugh, Mummy walks like
A pimp, Frankenstein is in a crate at the bottom of the lake,
The Creature From The Black Lagoon is monster diving, fence
Through the chest, but I'm still surviving, Mummy's in the
Closet, Monster Squad's the enemy, Shadow Brick road, Vanhelsing's
Dairy, I'm hear to break the amulet, Wolf Man give me the
Hammer, I regret the dosage, silver skull, wolf out in the
Phone booth, master wants children dead, mutiny, Frank's
A traitor, I got my three Vampire shezee's, and I'm going
To kill Rudy, so you best believe me, Fat Kid put garlic
Pizza on my face, I drive the cop cars, the squads erased,
Meeting adjourned, kaboom goes the tree house, bullets can't
Harm me, neither can you're army, half bat half amazing,
I'm walking toward the virgin, fire in my eyes, and the
Bushes burning, but Vanhelsing came through came the portal,
Best believe I'll be back, Dracula's immortal
It's the creature, creature, six foot fish, green scales
And black eyes, I'm kind of hard to miss, all the girlies
Clutch their pearls when I'm in town, I'm like the bottom
Of the pound, man I'm always down, Fat Kid here I come,
You better cock the shotty, give the pellets to the chest
Before I kill somebody...