Dear camela,
I cant believe how long its been since you left
its crazy How often I dream of seein you again
seeing you in front me - but then
I wake up - suddenly its all gone except the picture in my head
and That picture still is there damn I miss it when U read
stories to me when I couldnt fall asleep in my bed
cause the bed bugs would bite - but you said its alright
....I didnt believe you - so you stayed there all night
I guess it didnt have to be comfortable for you
As long as you could comfort me - thats what youd do
And I love you for that - camela ...you were heaven sent
You were my hero - from my birth till eleven then
That thing came....and started takin you away
slowly but surely... came that day.....
that day in spring ------ when you were released
from all the pain you were goin thru - rest in peace
.....camela...I love you forever
Camela.....camela...I love you forever
Camela.....camela...I love you forever
Camela.....camela...
and now 8 years on - Im writin this song
just to show you I never forgot you -despite bein gone
for the most of my youth - all my teenage years too
I wish you saw me grow from the kid I was to this dude
still a kid - still your god son - still your nephew
unlike marriage I love you longer than death do
us apart -and this is just a start - just a message
count my blessings - from my heart
Im restless when it comes to art
Ive tried so many times to write you but I always failed
everytime I sat down --- I didnt know what to tell
you - I just wanted to hold you - smell you
then you were prevailed from that sickness went thru hell
I cant even imagine what you went thru - never will
but all I can hope now is that youre doin well
better - cause all you deserve is the best
I love you forever - till my final breath
Camela.....camela..I love you forever
Camela.....camela..I love you forever
Camela.....camela..I love you forever
Camela.....Camela...
And I remember ------- the last moment we shared
I sat next to your bed - my hand on your forehead
my other hand was holdin yours - we just stared at each other
because you couldnt talk anymore
so we were..... talkin with our eyes - talkin with our souls
reminiscin bout the times - when ur life wasnt cold
sittin next to you that moment was the hardest shit Ive ever done
That feelin made me suffer - not a nother family member gone
I couldnt accept it - didnt understand the reason
all my family suffered greavin never seen my daddy screamin
not in anger - in desperation
cause he lost both sisters - but not his patience
And I admire him for that - He tried to stay strong
in front of us kids - cause thats what fathers want
to be the role model - no bottle helped him at all
We overcame the pain together - holdin on
I remember this one time when I came home from school one day...and this was when you already had cancer....you asked me what Im up to....I said I dont know...not much...Im probably just gonna go out and play or something....
you asked me if you could take me for a walk...and I was like yeah whatever... I mean as a 10 year you dont really go for walks with your aunt do you...
so we went out...we walked for a while.....then we sat on a bench... you took my hand.... and said.....Ryan... No matter what happens to me in the next week...month...or even years...I will always be with you. No matter if Im here when you grow up or not, I will always be watchin you..and protectin you..not only from the mosquitos in your room, but from all the things life throws at you. So when you feel sad...talk to me...write me a letter...I will hear you....Dont mourn my death...we will always be connected...