Michael John Lachiusa - The Greatest Practical Joke Lyrics

The greatest practical joke
Played on the common folk
Is God!
You want some mannegut?

The worst political prank
Played by the vile and rank
Is Christ! Mohammed
Buddah, Bishnou
Jokes of Smith and all his angels
To keep the poor in check
The business offers daily masses
And threatens Hell and heck!

Look at the world
You think there's a God?
There isn't a God!
Not when you got all those criminal types
Like Henry Kissinger sneaking around
And pedaling nukes!

Look at the world! If there's a God
You'd think he'd do something
To stop all the war
And the crime and the crap
And he'd punish those son of a bitches
Who write all those stupid new TV shows!

Look at the world!
There can't be a God
Not when you got those crazy nuns
Like Mother Theresa
Who don't give those Indians rubbers
And so they have babies and babies
And everyone's crowded
And hungry and starving...
Of course, if Indian food was all I had to eat...
I wouldn't eat!

There's lots of blood you can spill
You got the right to kill for God
Eat up this warm lasagna!
You'll earn your saintly reward
Aiming your missiles toward
The heathen who do not believe in
All the crap that you believe in!
You were always a gullible dope
You keep playing dumb and baby, you'll be the Pope!

So mange a feast before you fall
For the greatest practical joke
Of all!