Key of Awesome - Payphone Lyrics

Watching Game of Thrones
I haven't left home
Told everyone that I had the flu
It's an obsession, I'm filled with depression
'cus it's the end of season two

Now, my friends all tell me that I've lost my grip on reality
They tell me it's just a nerd show, but dragons are real to me
Some day those dragons will be grown
Daenerys will be my queen
And when we reclaim the thone you won't be allowed in our house

Don't call me at nine
On a Sunday night
I don't care who died
I'm filling my mind with sword fights and quests,
Horse Lords and incest
When Ned died I cried

Watching Game of Thrones
It's like a black hole
Wanna kill Joffrey with his own shoes
Magical kingdoms with naked women
And none of them have silicon boobs

And if the seven kingdoms did exist
I would drink and party with that Imp
Viserys had gold poured onto his head
He's no f***ing dragon now he's dead

Ouch

I'll sick my dierwolf on ya
If you get in my way
He's actually a chihuahua
But he'll still rip of your face

I only leave my apartment
To put the rent in the mail
That's right, I still pay my bills
'cus Lannister's repay their debts

I'm joining the Knights Watch
It's my birthright
I'll stand guard for White Walkers in the snow
This Wall kind of blows
No hot girls just bros and old crusty guys

Watching Game of Thrones
I feel bad for Jon Snow
It seems like he's always getting screwed
Gave up on Mad Men 'cus nothing happens
Except for when Don's wife sang Zou Bisou

The Lannisters all look like surfer dicks
Jamie banged his sister, she's a bitch
No one knows that King Joffrey's their kid
Except for maybe Peter Dinklage
This is his best role

This is nothing but nerd shit
You better get a damn grip and go outside and get some fresh air
Get your fat butt un-stuck from the chair
You ain't a dragon slayer just a loser in your underwear
Wait a second, did I just see a pair of boobs?
If you don't mind I'mma chill for a few with you
Dude, why is that girl pretending she's a boy, yo
Oh shit, that witch just gave birth to a cloud of smoke
How'd that hot naked blond chick survived the fire
Isn't that Mayor Carcetti from the Wire?
I apologise for being so shitty before
This show is Lord of the Rings but with titties galore
But I'm not sure who I'm supposed to root for
I like Rob Stark but I like the dwarf more
Call my manager and cancel my tour, I gotta read 'A Storm of Swords'

Oh, Theon Greyjoy, you were a nice boy
'til you had those two kids barbequed
Winter is coming
I'm not sure what that means
But you can bet it's probably bad news

I'm not playing music anymore
From now on you can just be Maroon 4
Next time they do The Voice I won't be there
Tell Cee-Lo his cat can have my chair
'cus I'm stuck in Game of Thrones
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