I tell you true caretaker broke my neck on the train
I was twenty-three
And in the hospital the priest called up that great Austrian on the phone
He spoke to me
Do you mind, is it alright if we stop by the post office in town?
It's been two days and my mailbox must be full by now
With magazines, weight lifting magazines
and a video comes for free
I'll let you watch it too, you've been so good to me
Well I've got a secret about pumping iron
Flail your arms like me
My friend I've been miserable for over a decade
The devil's name is Sally
Are you still in high school or are you twenty three?
Do you remember me?
Lay a towel down on the passenger seat
I can't trust my own body.
It's true I attended middle school with the great David Lee Roth
And if I played my cards right I too would be much better off
I'd be in magazines, chemistry magazines
I had a head for it in my youth.
But people can be evil, they'll try to fuck you
Well I heard they found you in Santa Monica
Naked in the alley
My friend I've been miserable for over a decade
The devil's name is...