Welcome back guys
I'm gonna roast myself again because, well, last time it just wasn't well done
Yo, 'sup!
I'm Gabbie
I'm a high roller
Rollin' through in a brand new Toyota Corolla
Live alone in a two-bedroom apartment
But it's real cheap, you can tell by the carpet
That's ok, 'cause I'm never home
I'm in the gym as you probably know
'Cause I post about it every single time, so my weight loss never slips your mind
I'm workin' out like 8 days a week
'Cause I can't control myself when I eat (I'm hungry)
Think I'm an Insta model now, what's that about?
By the way, have I mentioned that I work out?
Had the glow up of the motherfucking century
But I'll still die alone eventually
That's right I'm single and can't keep a man
I'm crazy in a way you can never understand
Lots of fans but where all my friends?
And, I'm alone every night of the weekend
'Cause my social life's been in the trash can
Love myself when I'm pumped with injections
Oh, uh, oh, oh, no, my views are low
Looks like my hair has got to go again
But, hey, no sweat, no biggie
As long as you pay attention to me
Pay attention to me
Pay attention to me
Always say I'm working hard but then again, who am I kidding?
See my job is a joke
I take selfies for a living
But I gotta say, it's not no work, all play
If you're not convinced, check my resume
Call myself a musician, but count my songs, 1, 2
First single, Out Loud, sounds better on mute
And speaking of single, it makes no sense man
I'm a satellite — but never had a true connection
My music's underwhelming but my biggest crimes are my New York Times best selling nursery rhymes
Storytime!
I admit, I may have overreacted
And I hope you can see past it if I'm over-dramatic
If my antics seem erratic and a touch problematic
It's an old habit
I do mental acrobatics
Make the situation seem undoubtedly traumatic
When the the truth is if you study my intense reactions, then my actions are a far cry from pragmatic
It's a business tactic
'Cause the honest fact is
If you break it down, it's really quite systematic
See I have audience that has a demographic
On a platform run by analytics
On a platform that's strictly algorithmic
On a platform as long as your charismatic
Then the platform rewards bein' a dick
So maybe that's me (if the shoe fits, wear it)
Hey, forgive me
Like this video and share it
And I think that we all forgive Bryan Le
'Cause he only did what you all wanna do to me
Overwhelmed, overworked, overpayed
I'm on top of the world, sittin' pretty on a stack
But the static still cracks in my veins
At the bottom of the universe, feelin' all the weight
People die for this
People lie for this
People suck and fuck some guy for this
Pay the toll for this
Sell their soul for this
Play my part, but what's my roll in this
I'm not built for this
All the guilt of this
And I don't think I can deal with this
I'm too old for this
Gonna fold from this
People starving and I get gold for this?
You all chalk me up as some whiny fuck who's stressed by success like, "my life sucks"
I get it, I know
It's such a conundrum
I get what I want, but I can't have much fun with it
It's not the fame or the money I'm yearnin'
I don't give a fuck about what I've been earnin'
But each day I wake up more blessed that I'm learing'
Of all these people, I'm least to deserve it
I don't deserve it
I try to be perfect
I'll never be perfect
I'm not worth it
I keep lookin' for answers, I swear that I'm searchin'
But I keep comin' short, and I give up quick
'Cause if I found it, I think I'd be scared of it
You don't see the scene behind the screen
And I urge you all to be aware of it
It’s an interesting dichotomy of monetized sincerity
Stir up my insecurity with constant uncertainty
Generation of anxiety
The “look at me” society
Dubiety of piety
The gods all suffer silently
I’m sorry for my obsession with attention
I have ungodly fear of rejection
My apprehension and objection is the viral infection
Of dollars and followers in place of affection
What I need is a human connection
Not blue light and a foggy reflection of my misconception of my own perception
A result of way too much introspection
They find my disinterest interesting
My depression, a funny thing
My decline is relatable
People love that I hate myself
Yeah, they love that I hate myself
People love that I hate myself
People love that I hate myself
People love that I hate myself
I climbed out of my head
And watched myself implode
A thought without a body
Ought to be a shot to take a load
Off my brain is poisoned
And I’m searching for the antidote
But every time I find it
My defenses scream “oh, no you don’t! ”
Woah
But it's fine
No, really I'm fine
It’s just a matter of time
You’ll lose your mind
And not be fine from time to time
I’m not crazy
But I feel crazy all a sudden
In a city never seein’
Snow or rain or leaves in autumn
Lose yourself in seasons
Not remembering that you forgot ‘em
Knocking on my door
I can’t confront ‘em so I lock them out
But I don’t mind
No, I really don’t mind
Cause believe it or not
It feels good to be forgot
From time to time
So forget me
And please, God, forgive me
If you feel a touched underwhelmed
By all my overwhelming negativity
Who am I and when?
When’s my work day end
And where does me begin?
Are these my colleagues or my friends?
On a scale of ten to one
Do you hate who I’ve become?
‘Cause I hate who I’ve become
I’m sorry for who I’ve become