FOXAL - Declaration of Self Lyrics

Woke up this morning, and opened my eyes,
Sat up in bed and to my surprise,
The world around me, it hasn't changed,
Life's still hard, and people still fake,
I sit here and ponder every mistake,
And wonder why life still ain't going the way that I want.
We all wish we could just turn things around sometimes
but then we're reminded this life that we now live is full of surprises
and words that are ad lib because you can't plan for a life this misguided
and when who I am was never decided.

So I hide it,
I'm just too scared to ignite it,
the fire inside, I'm frightened to find the pain of which I was once reminded.

And I'm scared of silence.
Cause when words leave off my brain turns on and my perspective widens.
There's some things I don't want to find,
like when I see all of my flaws and scream into the sky like

"Why God, Why?!"
Why don't I feel anymore, but at the same time I feel a hurt so deep that it cuts to my core?
Why does my heart ache and my soul hurts even more?
Why do I feel like no one cares and my friends walked out the door?

I know, that I'm not alone, but I feel so isolated.
If you care for me then why does every conversation feel so jaded?
When I write these words I feel like the pen can barely take it.
This music ain't for you, I write for me so that I can make it.

If I'm colorblind then my own worth is violent shades of red.
There's nothing more frightening than the thoughts inside my head,
And if my own greatest sacrifice is living till I'm dead.
But a thought within me tells me to fight the pain instead.

This ain't the end, no, this is the beginning,
I'm tired of being beaten down, so It's time that I start winning.
I don't know if this is God, or a power deep within me,
But all the sudden the dark inside, I feel it lifting.

For the first time in my life, I can the world so clearly.
All the pain that I feel inside, it send me reeling.
But if I never got hurt then I wouldn't know healing
And as the darkness fades away, I feel the light revere me...

This is life! This is battle!
The wounds and scars don't matter.
I wasn't made for this, my bones feel like they'll shatter.

If I take one more hit,
I'm afraid I might go down.
But at the same time I know,
That I'll get up off the ground,

And fight a battle that I can't win
But it's all about the journey.
Because we all love to win, but losing, is learning.

Today I fight for freedom,
Tomorrow for my kingdom.
You and I, I got your back,
Together we can beat em!

I'm broken and I'm bruised,
I'm hurt and I'm confused,
I don't even understand myself but what do I got to lose?

This is my calling, yeah,
This is my creed!
This is the time when I decide who I want me to be!

See you judge me, but you haven't taken a step in my shoes.
What will you do when it comes time to choose,
To Fit in, or be you? See I've always chose the latter,
And if you listen you can hear my voice through all the useless chatter.

Screaming "Why God, Why?"
But I know the answers inside,
This is my life, my fight, I'll fight till I die!

Today I'm lost, but tomorrow I'll find it.
The strength that I need to get up and fight it!

See who I am is nothing, but who I chose to be,
And through all the pain and the agony...
I choose to be me.
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