Brobdingnagian Bards - Do Virgins Taste Better Lyrics
A dragon has come to our village today
We have asked him to leave, but he won't go away
Now he's met with our king, and they've made out a deal
No homes will he burn, and no crops will he steal
Now there is but one catch, we dislike it a bunch
twice a year he invites him a virgin to lunch
we have no other choice, so the deal we'll respect
we can't help but wonder and pause to reflect
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Are they salty or sweet or more juicy or what?
Do you savor them slowly, gulp them down on the spot?
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Now we'd like to be shed you, and many have tried.
But no one can get through your thick scaly hide.
We hope that some day, some brave knight will come by.
'Cause we can't wait around 'til you're too fat to fly.
Now you have such good taste in your women for sure
They always are pretty, always are pure
But you're notion of dining it makes us all flinch
You're favorite entree is barbecued wench (mine too!)
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Are they salty or sweet or more juicy or what?
Do you savor them slowly, gulp them down on the spot?
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Now I found a solution, it works out so neat
If you insist on nothing but virgins to eat
No more will our number ever grow small
We'll simply make sure theres no virgins at all
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Are they salty or sweet or more juicy or what?
Do you savor them slowly, gulp them down on the spot?
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Now, I am a dragon, please listen to me
For I'm misunderstood to a dreadful degree.
This ecology needs me and I know my place,
But I'm fighting extinction with all of my race.
Well, I came to this village to better my health
Which is shockingly poor, despite all my wealth.
But I get no assistance and no sympathy,
Just impertinent questioning shouted at me.
Yes, virgins taste better than those who are not.
But my favorite snack food with peril is fraught.
For my teeth will decay and my trim go to pot.
Yet virgins taste better than those who are not.
Well, I'm really quite good almost all through the year.
Vegetarian ways are now mine out of fear.
But a birthday needs sweets as I'm sure you'll agree.
And barbecued wench tastes like candy to me!
As it happens our interests are almost the same.
For I'm really quite skillful at managing game.
If I ate just your men, would your excess decline?
Of course not, the rest would just make better time
Yes, virgins taste better than those who are not
But my favorite snack food with peril is fraught.
For my teeth will decay and my trim go to pot.
Yet virgins taste better than those who are not.
But the number of babies a woman can bear
Has a limit, and that's why my pruning's done there.
Yet an orphan's a sad sight and so when I munch.
I'm careful to take only virgins for lunch.