WEENIE:
You look a little lost, kid
You look a little scared
You seem a little worried, kid
A little unprepared
You seem a little flaccid, kid
It seems youve lost your wood
Did you come here alone, kid?
You look misunderstood
Lemme guess. Your masters gone astray?
No one around to sit and play?
No one to make you spurt and spray?
Well, todays your lucky day
Theres a warm, secluded place where a dick can feel at home
With miles of open space where dicks are free to roam
Got no time for your selfish owner
He sure missed out on a quality boner
Dont worry youll get your kicks cause
You just stumbled into the land of the dicks
You can let your hair grow out, theres nobody to make you trim
You can flop or go kerplop when youre everybodys favorite limb
You dont need to get total action
When youve got scrotal satisfaction
You can come anytime and get your fix
At a hot little joint called the land of the dicks
ALL DICKS:
A hot little joint called the land of the dicks
BIG T:
Cocks from far and wide
Oh, they lay down at my side
I take them in, and wipe their tears away
You may be lost now, Dick
But youre one lucky prick
Well make a one-eyed king of you today!
DICKS: (alternating)
Some are big and some are small
Some are slobs, and some well dressed
There are dicks of every kind
Its a regular sausage fest
You have miles at your disposal if you wanna go pissin
The golden rain flows as you watch it glisten
You can come anytime and get your fix
At a hot little joint called the land of the dicks
Whooo!
BIG T and DICKS:
I said pee-pee (pee-pee)
I said ding dong (ding dong)
Me tally wacker (tally wacker)
Schloong (schloong)
I said trouser snake
Private eye
Wing dang doodle
Sausage, choade, cock,
DICK:
Dick!
ALL:
DICK!
Theres a warm, secluded place where a dick can feel at home
With miles of open space where dicks are free to roam
Got no time for your selfish owner
He sure missed out on a quality boner
Dont worry youll get your kicks
You can come and get your fix
Its time to mingle and mix
Cause you just stumbled in to the land
Of the dicks!