When you're hanging with a friend you don't see very much
You know the kind
You see them once every year for coffee or brunch
And you struggle really hard to think of things to talk abo-out
Oooh
So you talk about the weather, and pretend that you care
When she said tried something new with her hair
So you fake a smile but then the worst thing in the world happened
Oooh
This awful thing also happens when you're in an Uber
It's also very common when you're with strangers on an elevator
So brace yourself because this awful thing is about to occur
*silence*
It's awkward silence
It's the worst thing in the world
When you go to your friend's house and you're hanging with them
And you're having lots of fun and then their parents come in
But suddenly your friend decides to leave the room
Oh no
You small talk with the parents for a minute or two
But that doesn't last long and you don't know what to do
And you know what's coming next so you pray your friend will come back and save you
Mmm
This awful thing also happens when you're in an Uber
It's also very common when you're with strangers on an elevator
So brace yourself because this awful thing is about to occur
*silence*
It's awkward silence
I would rather have a hangnail
I would rather date your mom
I would rather get a papercut or lick a bathroom stall
Anything is better than awkward silence
I would rather watch Dawson's Creek
I would rather eat your poo
I would rather not skip the ad on YouTube
Anything is better than awkward silence
I would rather step in ice cube puddles while wearing socks
I would rather use my nails on a chalkboard instead of chalk
Anything is better than awkward silence
I would rather have diarrhea
I would rather watch my parents hum
I would rather listen to Nickelback or hang out with Trump
Actually, I don't think I'd rather do that one. No.
Almost anything is better than awkward
*pause*
Silence